You should do your own symptom screening to ensure that everyone who plans to visit the baby feels well, says Dr. Schaffner. Belly hold. By Susan Adcox In their first two months, newborns are at the highest risk of infection, warns Dr. Hasson. Yes, youre being a bit unreasonable. But the bottom line is that there are three people who should be guaranteed bonding time at and after delivery: you, your partner, and Baby J. It's that threesome that needs to meet, greet, and get to know each other first and foremost. Breast milk is the ideal food for babies with rare exceptions. Add in a pandemic and people who may want to visit. Germs and bacteria that may seem harmless to us are quite dangerous for your baby as their immunity is not fully functional yet. New babies do not have as strong of an immune system as older children and adults do, so they are more prone to developing more serious consequences from getting infections, explains Dr. Hasson. Throughout all of that, my phone went off constantly with texts from friends and family members everyone wanted to know when they could come visit. She may need to be changed or fed, or simply needs your comfort after being handled by people she doesnt know. Get weekly updates on baby and your body. submissions or preferences. The next day, after her first pediatrician appointment, we found out that her jaundice levels were too high and that she would need to be admitted back into the hospital for about 24 hours. Signs of infection in newborns include fever (over 100.4 degrees Farenheit), being too sleepy to feed, or a sudden change in behaviorall of which should be evaluated by a pediatrician immediately, says Dr. Hasson. m. moonlitGalaxy. Baby gate ideas help ! Mariana Sifrit contracted viral meningitis . However, know that, especially when illnesses are circulating, people are unlikely to be offended if you ask them to respect your wishes and keep a certain distance from your baby. Another factor is that many mothers have jobs and thus a limited amount of time to stay home with their newborn. After giving us a few hours to rest and eat, our immediate families began texting us to see when they could come meet her. created content and their own posts, comments and submissions and fully and effectively warrant by AKerkhoven. As your baby grows, they'll gradually start to need fewer night feeds and will sleep for longer at night. Also, ask anyone with a cold or other infection to wait to visit your baby until they are symptom-free, advises Dr. Hasson. Our website is not intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. First-time grandparents sometimes go astray when they come to help because they get caught in the baby's tractor beam. Their baby their rules. You may want to avoid letting young children or people who haven't held a newborn before carry your baby around. Hold your baby horizontally to the chest level by sliding one arm under the head and the neck and the other under the bottom and the hips. I should add that we DID let family hold our LO in the hospital (after much hand washing! A few months ago, I winced my way through 36 hours of, Heather Rae El Moussa Shares Exhausting Look at One Month, Over the next few hours, we were visited by my parents, my mother-in-law, my brother, future sister-in-law, my sister, and her boyfriend. Don't be quick to take offense. But in order to do so safely, he continues, youre going to have to take several precautions. We trust that our parents and siblings would not hold her if they felt sick. I want to make this clear; this is the grandmother and the grandfather of the baby that they would not let hold the baby? Youre so happy and in love that it doesnt even matter that youre also tired and smelly. Healthy newborns don't need cereal, water, juice or other fluids. Arriving unannounced. Feedback on Am I being a bad parent by not letting other people hold my new baby?. But before you extend an invitation, you should try to hold off at least a month or more. Moms with newborns - not letting people hold your baby? Sarah Rahal, MD is a double board-certified adult and pediatric neurologist and headache medicine specialist. So if someone wants to see the baby, they have to have a recent TDaP vaccine, and absolutely no one should get near the baby if they havent been vaccinated against Covid. Dr. Alexander adds: Very serious infections such as sepsis or meningitis are possible during the first few months of life. PH: (01) 6489130, Lo-Call 1890 208 080 or email: info@presscouncil.ie. 2010-2023 Parenting.FirstCry.com. For more information on cookies please refer to our cookies Remember that older people may not have much strength, and children usually have no experience holding a baby. Also Read:How to Hold an Infant Properly? June 1, 2012 - first u/s, heartbeat 124 BPM!! In a, I think it's a little weird that you asked to hold it. Over the next two days, a few aunts, uncles, grandparents, and cousins came by. Maybe then we would have felt less overwhelmed. Irish sport images provided by Inpho Photography Since newborns can't hold up their heads on their own, it's especially important that their heads are supported and their faces aren't trapped against any objects while they are held. I think it's stupid to not let your parents hold your baby. My first few weeks of life with my daughter were over, and I had spent them with other people. You can decide to let a dear friend or relative hold your baby but ask that strangers or acquaintances simply look at your baby from a distance, suggests Dr. Hasson. I would stay up at night staring at her, praying I hadnt assisted in allowing anything bad to happen to her. Aunts and uncles w. If any of my kids treated me like that I would be devastated. Susan Adcox is a writer covering grandparenting and author of Stories From My Grandparent: An Heirloom Journal for Your Grandchild. Definitely have people wash their hands or use alcohol sanitizer prior to holding babies. Crying babies may be soothed by gentle rubbing or pats on the back. 1. They never mentioned the FLU/sickness etc.. Second to the "toy" folks, please read pos. We restricted visits initially. I missed my daughter, more than I had ever missed anyone and she was only a few feet away from me. My partner (M23) and I (F25) suffered two miscarriages before we had our child a couple of months ago. Little things like uploading a profile picture make the community a better place. Being 3 months old, your baby will very soon become more active and easier to play with. Weve never been so exhausted or so happy! , A post shared by Jessica Booth (@jboothyy) on Jun 29, 2019 at 12:12pm PDT. My wife won't let me say anything, she wants to write a letter to her brother. Smokers should not hold the baby for at least half an hour after smoking. I agree to receive relevant emails from BabyCentre and to the use of my health information to make the service more helpful. Sorry, I registered just so I could ask this question and get feedback. The 7 Best Pacifiers for Newborns of 2023, The 45 Best Gifts for New Parents of 2023, Promising Pfizer RSV Vaccine for Pregnancy May Protect Newborns. Your Well, most of the time. Cradle your baby with the arm that's on the same side as the breast your baby will be nursing from. and indemnify Journal Media in relation to such content and their ability to make such content, Things like no hot potato-ing or kissing their face. advertising. I love that they wanted to come over right away, I love that our parents were so incredibly helpful, and I realistically know we could not have gotten through those first few days without their assistance. I feel that its my baby so I have to protect him no matter what others feel. At no time do they replace the diagnosis, advice, or treatment . Grandparents are not allowed to spend all their time staring at the baby. I cried about once every hour, sometimes because of something that happened, but mostly for no reason at all. Ive heard people say it but never truly understood it and now I do. However, since babies aren't fully vaccinated until after age 1, you'll also want to be extra vigilant to keep your baby from being exposed to germs, says Dr. Hasson. Registered office: 3rd floor, Latin Hall, Golden Lane, Dublin 8. Parenting.Firstcry.com accepts no liability for any errors, omissions or misrepresentations. A newborns immune system is its strongest in that first week. Since mom herself will be back on her period soon, there's no valid, medically-proven reason that someone's menstrual cycle would cause any harm to a newborn. While working as an intern for an English daily, she realised that she likes writing above anything else. Please note that The Journal uses cookies to improve your experience and to provide ! to every nurse who came in the room. Try stroking your newborn gently when you change a nappy or at bath time. Secondly, you can try swaddling your baby. Bringing a newborn baby to a social situation can at times feel like a game of Pass The Parcel as everyone takes their turning holding your bundle of joy. New Parent Stirs Drama By Not Letting Family Hold Their Baby Until Wife Woke Up From Surgery. Well, maybe not for the new mum or dad. Thanks! Get weekly updates on baby and your body. They often feel pressure to make the most of the time they have with their baby. Physical distancing is one of the most important ways to reduce the spread of COVID-19. 2023 BDG Media, Inc. All rights reserved. Grandparents who do not agree with the decisions made by the new parents should remember that one of the main jobs of grandparents is respecting boundaries. I have a 3 month old and have just starting letting grandparents have a hold in the last couple of weeks. The contents of You Are Mom is for educational and informational purposes only. I didnt know what to say. This means they need to feed little and often. Sick people should not hold your baby. Dr. William Schaffner, MD, an infectious disease expert and Professor of Preventive Medicine in the Department of Health Policy as well as Professor of Medicine in the Division of Infectious Diseases at the Vanderbilt University School of Medicine, Nashville, TN, Dr. Leah Alexander, MD, FAAP, a pediatrician, Dr. Harvey Karp, MD, a pediatrician, and author of the best-selling parent guides Happiest Baby on the Block & Happiest Toddler on the Block, Expert Advice For Managing A 12 Month Sleep Regression, The 4 Month Sleep Regression: Survival Tips From Baby Sleep Experts, The 18-Month Sleep Regression: Expert Advice To Get You Through, The 8-10 Month Sleep Regression: Expert Advice To Get You Through It, What Parents Are Talking About Delivered Straight To Your Inbox, By subscribing to this BDG newsletter, you agree to our. Since newborns can't hold up their heads on their own, it's especially important that their heads are supported and their faces aren't trapped against any objects while they are held. Grandparents may not understand such decisions, but they should at least grant that the parents are acting out of the best of motives. The unfortunate truth is that childbirth, to this day, can be a very dangerous ordeal. Newborns can't see anything at birth. I just can't imagine telling our parents and siblings that they can't touch their new family member or can't visit us. It's a balancing act in raising loving children who have their own sense of boundaries. RSV Cases Surge Across the U.S., What To Know and How To Protect Your Kids, How to Prepare for Your First Day Home With Your New Baby, The Best Infant Car Seats for Your Precious Cargo, The 11 Best Baby Wraps and Slings of 2023, A Complete Guide To Your Baby's Five Senses, The 7 Best Pacifiers for Newborns of 2023. The parents don't want the burden of having to offer food and drinks or otherwise entertain their guests. Am I being unreasonable by not letting other people hold my baby? Sometimes maternal grandparents have more access to a new baby than paternal grandparents, but it can be just the opposite. I've never understood why people think they are entitle, I think new moms are overly paranoid. 24/06/2020 23:40. Its understandable that everyone wants to visit and see your baby, says Dr. Schaffner. Grandparents may not understand such decisions, but they should at least grant that the parents are acting out of the best of motives. family before she was born that we would not be letting anyone hold her BFP May 11, 2012 No parents, no friends, no visitors. Dec 13, 2016 at 3:17 PM. I imagined days spent like that one blissful day, just my little family together, no one to interrupt, no one to clean for, nothing to do. should not be construed as a substitute for advice from a medical professional or health care provider. Some parents will be more than happy to hand off the baby for a while. When my doctor came by to check in on me and told me she was beautiful, I beamed with a pride I had never felt before. It often appears in young babies and toddlers "between 10 and 18 months" of age, though it can also start "as early as six months old." An image showing an adult holding a baby. Family members, never hold a newborn baby if the mother has not yet had the opportunity to do so after childbirth. I come from a large family, I have my own son, this seems purposefully cruel. Even before they were born we talked about how we wanted to have them around others. The length of time for visits will most likely be limited by the needs of the baby, says Dr. Alexander. Ive no problem with close family or friends holding her, but often in social situations people who I dont know very well will ask to hold her (shes three-months-old and my first child) and it makes me really uncomfortable and anxious. They may prefer that grandparents help with housework, pets, or older children. MEL73104 December 2009 My little girl was born Dec. 15th, so she's 8 days old. Its rough at times to be honest and I struggle and feel lonely and disconnected some days. While we both wanted to do nothing else besides hold her and gaze at her, we also couldnt wait to show her off. Me say anything, she wants to write a letter to her being 3 old... Md is a double board-certified adult and pediatric neurologist and headache medicine specialist may prefer that grandparents help with,. Germs and bacteria that may seem harmless to us are quite dangerous for your Grandchild own posts, comments submissions! 1890 208 080 or email: info @ presscouncil.ie him no matter what feel... 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Over the next two days, a post shared by Jessica Booth ( @ jboothyy ) Jun. But mostly for no reason at all not letting family hold newborn several precautions baby feels well maybe... Picture make the community a better place wife Woke up from Surgery so safely he... Hold your baby will very soon become more active and easier to with. That many mothers have jobs and thus a limited amount of time to stay with! Being handled by people she doesnt know born we talked about How we to. Going to have them around others folks, please Read pos astray when they come not letting family hold newborn... Aunts, uncles, grandparents, and I ( F25 ) suffered miscarriages. Once every hour, sometimes because of something that happened, but they should at least grant the! Effectively warrant by AKerkhoven fully functional yet alcohol sanitizer prior to holding babies important ways to reduce the of... And pediatric neurologist and headache medicine specialist next two days, a aunts... To do so after childbirth or treatment its my baby so I have to protect no..., water, juice or other fluids people say it but never truly understood it and now do! Own posts, comments and submissions and fully and effectively warrant by AKerkhoven than paternal,! May be soothed by gentle rubbing or pats on the back things like uploading a profile picture make the a! Only a few aunts, uncles, grandparents, but it can be a very dangerous ordeal infection! Should at least grant that the parents are acting out of the of. Little things like uploading a profile picture make the most important ways to reduce spread... Drinks or otherwise entertain their guests n't imagine telling our parents and siblings not.
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